Ask Me No Questions

Hollywood legend Greta Garbo has long been associated with the words:

“I want to be alone.”

However, it seems as if Greta felt she’d been misquoted! In his 1955 book “Garbo”, author John Bainbridge includes the following explanation from the lady, herself:

‘I never said, “I want to be alone.” I only said, “I want to be let alone! There is all the difference.’

Recently, after a long day of errands and shopping, Crystal felt quite a kinship with Miss Garbo. Yes, it’s true. Crystal also wanted to be “let alone”…


It all started innocently enough. Crystal went to a local gift shop to buy a birthday present. She handed her selection to the clerk and pulled out her wallet to pay . . .

That’s when the barrage of questions began…

Clerk: Are you a preferred shopper?

Crystal: No. Thank you.

Clerk: Would you like to be a preferred member?

Crystal: No. Thanks, anyway.

Clerk: Do you know it’s free to join?

Crystal: Yes, but I’m all set.

Clerk: Would you like to take the form home? Maybe fill it out, later?

Crystal: Umm, no.

Clerk: Do you realize that if you are a “member” you’ll get a free (thing-a-ma-jig) after you spend $100.00?

Crystal: I’m not interested, but thank you just the same.


The Clerk sighed and then tapped the register keys to ring-up the birthday gift.

At this point, Crystal figured she would soon be leaving for the next stop on her errands list. She was wrong.

The clerk continues: Would you like to use your store charge card for this purchase?

Crystal: No, it will be cash, today.

Clerk: Do you have a charge card with us?

Crystal: No, I don’t.

Clerk: Would you like to open an account with us, right now?

Crystal: No, thank you.

Clerk: Ok, would you like to donate to _____? (a worthy charitable cause)
We can just add the amount to today’s purchases . . .

Crystal: Not today.
(Crystal tries to give generously – as often as she can – but the requests are everywhere! Even Daddy Warbucks would be broke if he were to say yes every time.)

Clerk: Your zip code, please?

Crystal rattles it off.

Clerk: May I have your phone number?

Crystal: You may not! (Crystal answers rather impatiently… and then feels sorry.)

Clerk: That will be $22.70

Crystal gives cash to the clerk.

Clerk hands a receipt to Crystal.

Clerk leans towards Crystal says in a very earnest voice: Now, be sure to go online as soon as you get home! Visit the website listed right there at the bottom of your slip and take our shopper’s survey!!!

Crystal nods as politely as she can, takes the receipt and her change, and heads for the door.

As she leaves, she swears she can hear the clerk call after her . . .



🙂 Ok, I’m kidding about the fries part, but I cannot believe what a nuisance it is to go shopping, lately!

I realize the clerks are just doing their jobs but – whew!

It’s exhausting to be a customer.

Do you find it to be the same?



I’d love to hear your thoughts!

Click the envelope to leave a comment! 😀